The Real Memphis Mike (don't settle for imitations)

While out doing some last minute Christmas shopping, I came across Tom Jones' CD "Praise & Blame" at Best Buy for $7. I'd downloaded a couple of tracks from it earlier this year and really enjoyed them, so I figured what the heck, I'd get myself a lil Christmas pressie. WOW! That's the best I can give for starters. I've long viewed Mr. Jones as a bit of a joke, albeit a very successful one. I've found most of his music to be tepid, calculated and droll...appealing only to the old women who throw their granny panties at him, and to those who claim to like his music purely for kitsch value. Jones, however, has long had a rebellious streak. His 1st singles were considered 'raunchy' but he soon learned to conform. When his career began to lag, he turned to country music. This never quite clicked for him but in 1987, he recorded the Prince song "Kiss" backed by The Art of Noise. Considered at the time a fluke, this was pretty damned...

OK, so the new CD hasn't even been officially released and we have our 1st review already! LOL It's all about promotion kids! LOL That said, the reviewer, my good buddy Marvin over at Blackcat Rockabilly Europe mentioned at one point that I "put a little distortion on the guitar amp and out comes Little Juliet". Allow me to say this: I do NOT use effects! I've never liked them. I like the sound of a guitar through an amp. Period. Full stop. Nuff said. That said, I used the same amp on every song on this CD. In fact, I don't even think I changed the settings at all during the sessions! I did, however, manage to get a nice array of sounds. "HOW?" you may be asking. Well, I'll tell ya! When I play, I keep my volume & tone controls wide open. If I'm using my 1960 Gibson 175, especially for a rockabilly song like "Starlight Starbright", I'll use both pickups and maybe dial the neck pickup back a hair. If I'm using one of my ...

Here it is, already December! Time for Christmas shopping and the usual silly season stuff. This time of year I always try to think back on what's happened in the past year. 2010 has been an exceptionally WEIRD but WONDERFUL year! It's been 3 years since my heart attack and I'm still kicking! The legal mess continues and while some would be ready to give up, I refuse to. As my beloved Aussies say, "She'll be right mate". I can say that I've been blessed in many ways...some obvious, some not so obvious. This year I got back into my field and damn, I missed it! 2 years away from it seemed like a lifetime! If you're not lucky enough to have a career that you love, stop what you're doing and find one! It makes all the difference in the world! I'm proud to say that I've made a difference in the lives of some very special clients...including one who everyone had pretty much given up on. He & I now share a trust and friendship that I have to ...

This is the 5th year in a row that I've posted this blog. I hope y'all enjoy it! A lot has changed in my life since the 1st time I posted it but all in all, life is good! Cheers! BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND!!!!!! 5th YEAR!!!!!! Thanksgivus Thanksgivus: that's what she called it. The 'she' in question would be a very short, loud, middle aged black woman with retardation who I supervised for years. Her name is Omega...fitting because she truly is THE END! Omega didn't exactly have a speech problem but I think her hearing wasn't 100% on the mark, as certain words would get slurred together such as "Thanksgivus". Another fave was her version of Social Security, which often sounded more like "sociable secretary" (of which I've known a few). Thanksgivus (which is what I now prefer to call the US holiday Thanksgiving) is the last Thursday of November (this is for my overseas friends who may not be fully knowledgeable of the subject). It is the ho...

The politicians are on the march. They want YOUR vote! Remember...that's all they want. The Republicans (and Tea Party lunatics) want a return to how things used to be. Here's a little reminder of just how 'well' their way worked. In June of 2008, gas prices here in Pittsburgh were at an average of $4.05 per gallon. They are currently $2.85. In June of 2008, at least a third of the people I know were either unemployed or grossly underemployed. Banks were falling apart. Homes were being foreclosed left and right (I can think of at least a half dozen in my neighborhood alone). Things looked pretty grim. Obama was elected President and the Republicans lost no time in starting their racist rhetoric. Was he a Muslim? Was he born in the US? Was he a space alien? What he was, and is, is a half black, half white AMERICAN man who was elected President and is making good on his promises. Sure, it's not happening overnight. Remember, when George W. Bush took the office, we had...

I've long suggested that people support live music. Without the support of the 'fans', it'll fade away. That said, allow me to address a serious issue with live music. Promoters. I swear, there should be a test/licensing involved in becoming a concert promoter! I haven't met many that have the intelligence beyond that of a hydrocephalic spider monkey. At least not locally. I had planned to go to see former Wall of Voodoo singer Stan Ridgway last night at a SMALL bar here in town. I've played this joint numerous times over the years and I'll tell ya, its a nice place. When I got there, I see the poster on the door and the promoter is charging $23 a head! First off...WEIRD price! Why not just make it $25? The section of town this bar is in is pretty low rent/blue collar. People want to go out and have some drinks and a bit of fun. They do NOT want to drop $20+ just walking in the door. (this ain't NYC or LA!) Factor in having a few drinks....and if you...

It's been another year since it happened. I thought after all these years it would get easier. It hasn't. If anything, I've merely grown accustomed to the hole in my life without you. I still get angry at the fuckers that you took you and so many others. Some days I can just about contain the anger...then I think of your smile and I'm "ok" again for awhile. I think I've changed alot since I lost you. I think you'd love me even more (if that's possible). I think you'd be proud of how I handle things these days. I guess you could say I've "mellowed". I have to wonder what you'd be like today. I wonder what would have become of "us". I still think of you on your birthday. Hell, I still think about you almost everyday. I've got cancer again...I'm glad you don't have to go through that with me...you know what a младенец I can be when I'm sick. LOL It amazes me how much I still miss you...even after all we ...

There are 2 kinds of religious zealots in the world. Those who are in it for their own selfish actions (mostly seeking attention) and those who mean it. That said, this weekend could get very ugly for Americans globally if the fools of The Dove World Outreach Center start burning Korans. Muslim zealots are serious. They take their beliefs serious enough to die for them. I've yet to meet an American religious nut serious enough to do it. They might miss something on TV! Pastor Terry Jones exemplifies the worst of America; small minded, mean, disrespectful and ultimately every bit as dangerous as his Muslim counterparts. To even think about burning a Koran, Bible, etc...is just downright wrong. While one may not believe in the teachings, there are others that do and to destroy a symbol of one's faith is not only disrespectful, it's downright evil. FACT: The Bible and the Koran were both written by men. They have many similar stories. There is yet to be any documented physica...

So, I went to my former fave watering hole this eve. Damn...the old place sure has changed. Without naming names, I'll tell ya this much: my granddad, who passed on in 1957, used to drink there. It was pretty much always a small time, neighborhood, old man bar. When I used to drink there, they still refused to have a juke box. Instead, the old TV was usually on A&E or Court TV. Drinks were unbelievably CHEAP! For Pete's sake...the place had a pachinko machine! I remember when my friend Jimmy and his then girfriend were in for a visit. We stopped at my little neighborhood bar to prime the pumps. I bought the first round...smirking all the while. When Jimmy went for the next round, he came back suggesting that they had "undercharged him". I told him, with some personal glee, that no they hadn't; the prices where just that cheap! I stopped going there after I was filmed there for an interview for a documentary on rockabilly music. It took me 5 hours to get out o...

I guess you could say that June 2010 was my month. I kept busy for sure! For starters, I finally settled my artist endorsement thingy with Republic Guitars . Just about a year ago, my good friend Sean Chambers (Sean Menscher & The Rhythm Kings, The Rowdy Bovines) contacted me about Republic and how he was trying to hook me up with an endorsement. Anyone that knows me knows the past couple years kicked my ass, so simply put, I just couldn't be bothered. Well, now that I have it and I have 2 new Republics (a Tricone and a reso uke) I'm kicking myself for not hopping on this earlier! They make truly excellent gear! I've also been working some insane hours at "the real job"...so much in fact that I finally took a vacation!!! 1st one in 15 years! And you know what? I enjoyed it! I might actually take another one! LOL While on vacation, I got to visit my dear friend Dez, my baby cousin Lulu and my old friends Hayden & Georgia, who were kind enough to feed me...a...

If you've been following my rants with any level of regularity then you already know my views on the current trends in music. There are many talented acts out there but most people aren't willing to venture out to see them. Worse than that are the new breed of "promoters". These cats think that their job is to find a venue, book a bunch of bands (who usually can't get gigs anywhere else) and make the bands sell the tickets. It's just 'pay to play' all over again. I won't be part of it. I received this email this morning and I just about blew my top: Hey!I’m Dan from Standard_Issues_Productions, a new booking/promotion group based here in Pittsburgh. We have decided to make my small move on the Pittsburgh scene. Shows I have to offer right now are all at The Rex Theater.Dates are July 11th, 18th and 25th. These are Sunday shows. They will all be 21+ shows. These dates will be filled with local talent, and perhaps out of town "local" bands....

DISCLAIMER: I wrote this earlier today and have been torn as to whether or not to publish it. I know one or two friends who may be upset by it. That said, I feel it more important to share the truth "as I understand it". The gay community, in my lifetime, has made great strides. People are more educated, tolerant, accepting than before. While gay bashing does unfortunately still exist, the occurrences have, thankfully, declined over the past 20-25 years. As always, feel free to comment. If you'd rather, feel free to email me @ michaelcmetzger@gmail.com And now, my blog....... Gay bashing, in the 21st century, should be a thing of the past. I'm old enough to remember when it was a daily threat in the gay community. Time marches on, however, and thanks to education, tolerance and acceptance, these sorts of atrocities are few and far between these days...especially in Pittsburgh, which for its size boasts at least 8 or 9 gay bars. As many of you may already know, there w...

People make me sick. Literally. I watched a PBS documentary this evening on vaccinations. It amazes me just how stupid, uneducated and uninformed some people are and choose to remain. It seems that just because they see a video about something on YouTube that they take it as gospel! For Pete's sake folks...look at the source! This level of idiocy is part of what is making all of us sicker. These parents who choose to not have their children vaccinated are also choosing to increase the risk of disease for everyone else. By not having your child vaccinated that leaves your child open to contracting any number of illnesses...illnesses which are, in fact, still around, like polio, dyptheria, whooping cough, etc. Most young mothers these days were never exposed to the types of dangers that these diseases pose. They think that because they don't see it in their own back yard that its not a threat. Well guess again folks. We live in a global society. People travel to and from one coun...

OK, I'm 44 years old now...so I guess that officially makes me old enough to remember when. I remember when most Americans made a decent living, owned their own home, weren't completely saddled with credit card debt, paid their bills on time, weren't worrying about foreclosure and laughed at the thought of buying a Japanese TV or car. Those days really weren't that long ago! Here it is 2010 and what do WE as a country have to show for it? Not much from where I'm sitting. "American Made" usually means overpriced and poorly made (in the eyes of the global economy which we are now a part of, whether you like it or not). Look at everything you own...how much of it was made overseas? Look at your car, your TV, your cell phone...hell, look at your clothes...where were they made? Sure, you saved some bucks...but at what cost? How many people do you know who's job has been "outsourced"? If you know one, that's too many. Sure, people in other coun...

I used to hate recording. Once upon a time, it seemed so damned tedious. Start, stop, start, stop...as a younger man I was far more interested in the immediacy of the live performance. As I'm getting older, I'm enjoying recording more now. I can capture a moment in time and save it forever. I think that all recording artists have a different style of recording. My good friend and mentor, Alan Leatherwood, has a unique style of piecing his albums together. I learned a lot about recording from him! I also learned that its best to do things however one is comfortable doing them at the time. I usually like to work really fast. Sam Phillips once explained to me that recording is all about capturing the 'right' moment. So what if there's a minor flaw in it provided you capture the energy of the moment. This latest CD (working title "7 More To Go") of mine has by no means been a quick production! It started 3 years ago. At the time, my aussie drummer, Brian Franc...

I just turned down a bunch of shows. Why? Simple: if you ain't talking money, don't talk to me. That said, allow me to clarify. There are some bands/musicians who are "hobbyists". They're cool with going out and lugging a few hundred pounds of gear around and making noise for free...it gives them something to do, I guess. I'm not one of them. I can play my guitar anywhere for free and not have to lug spare guitars, amps, a PA system, etc. around to do it. Times have changed and not necessarily for the better. It used to be that if a venue booked bands, they understood that the risk was theirs. The band showed up, did their job and hopefully the audience was there, enjoyed their show and all were happy. Bands were an enticement for patrons to come out. The trick was, if your band was unknown or didn't draw, you didn't work. (note: I say "work" because it IS work) Nowadays, the venues that still have bands now put the risk onto the performers. ...

OK, I went out and bought a new bike today! Why you ask? A) I seriously need to get back into a shape other than "round" B) Pittsburgh has some absolutely AWESOME bike trails! C) It sounded like a good idea at the time! LOL I just got back from my 1st ride....in over 25 years! KEEEEEEEEEEE-RIST!!!!!!!!! If you ever want to feel foolish, try hopping on a mountain bike when you haven't ridden a bike in decades. Add to this having to start on a hill and you start to get the picture! I wobbled like mad at first...then realized my legs were about to rip apart! Who the hell needs 18 gears on a bike?????? 10 speeds were confusing enough for me! LOL Anyhoo, I "zipped" up the street and around the church a few times. I can't tell you the last time I was this out of breath! It's maybe 50 degrees out and I'm sweating like a pig in a sauna! BUT IT FEELS GOOD!!!!!! I really need to figure out these gears...the bike almost seems to have a mind of its own just yet...

The title of this blog is an old BB King song...absoultely BAD ASS stuff! OK, I'm writing this for 2 reasons: 1) I find it extremely cathartic 2) People often come to me with their problems. Everyone thinks that they're the only ones to have a rough time...and I feel for them. That said, I too have known some extremely rough times. Its called "life". You can live it and enjoy it or you can wallow in your own self-perpetuating misery. Here is a list of some of the "highlights" of my own dysfunctional life: *1st suicide attempt @ age 4 *sickly childhood *numerous episodes of family violence *haven't been painfree since age 8 (rheumatoid arthritis) *parents split at age 12 *found mom dead at age 13 *started smoking at 13 *started drugs at 14 *started drinking regularly at 15 *arrested at 15 for carrying a concealed weapon *expelled from school *3 years of court ordered psych treatment 15-18 *many bad relationships starting at age 19 *in/out of college from ...

I'm proud to be an American. I love my country and at different points in my life have had to prove that love and pride. No, not as an armed member of the military but as just a man, and I had to use my wits and a few times, my fists. I've been singled out in other countries, whether it be in a bar, waiting for a train, or standing in the checkout line buying groceries; I am an American! I've listened patiently while people in these other countries take their hatred of the USA out on me. I then respond either with carefully thought out words or perhaps a single finger gesture (hey, I have bad days too!). America is #1...to us. It seems all countries have their nationalistic tendencies and none are waving banners that read "WE'RE #2!" Why do they hate us? Basicially, its not a jealousy issue. Its basically because we're a nation of crybabies...and no one likes a crybaby. Look at the latest mess: we somehow managed to pass some watered down version of healt...

Yes folks. I'm still sober. A lot of people seem to forget this. I haven't. While it was relatively easy to give up booze for me, I'd like to take a minute to explain just why I did it. Do I think I'm an alcoholic? In short, no. That said, problems were starting to arise. I attribute some of them to just getting older but some may be rooted a bit deeper. My cousin nearly drank himself to death not long after my heart attack. That scared me. Basically, I just no longer saw the use of drinking. I no longer enjoy the company of drunks. (snobby SOB ain't I? lol) Hear me out, I can't nor will I ever condemn anyone for having a drink...Lord knows I drank enough! LOL But after 30 years in the music biz, 30 years of playing in bars, nightclubs, afterhours joints, etc...I grew tired of it. I've never 'craved' alcohol. I've never felt dependent upon it. Sure, I had my pre-show ritual (2 beers) for years...but I've done quite a few shows stone cold so...

I was conversing with a friend of 20 or so years this eve & she I both commented on how difficult its becoming to have a serious talk with people in their 20s (or younger). If I've learned nothing else in my nearly 44 years on this chunk O dirt, I've learned to listen to my elders and their experiences and to bare them in mind when making my own decisions. I've learned to temper my impulses with some good old fashioned common sense. I attribute much of the success that I've enjoyed to the words of those who came before me. I listened to every word. Sure, I often went my own way but not without remembering the words of my elders. I've also learned that many of my failures could have been averted had I followed the advice of these same elders. So, to all the 20-somethings out there who think they know it all, know what they're doing and have it all planned and figured out...GOOD FOR YOU! I hope that your vast knowledge lasts your entire life and that all the b...

Tomorrow afternoon, I'll be going to the funeral home to pay my last respects to a former client; a most interesting guy, to be sure! I was lucky enough to know and work with this man for over a dozen years. He could be moody, a bully, a sweetheart, a clown...in short, he was a regular guy. He had his good and bad days just like everyone else. He also happened to have Downs Syndrome. His name was David. David was just a few years older than me and our birthdays were just weeks apart, so that gave us some similar points of reference. He had an infectious laugh and his own unique sense of humor and style. For a large man, he loved to dance! He would literally spin himself in time with the music and few people have ever enjoyed music quite the way he did. David's appetites in life were voracious. He loved food, he loved his friends and most of all, he loved his Super Powers. His "super powers" were large markers that he would occasionally talk to. While this may sound od...

It's time for more of my whacky numbers...numbers that you might not have given much thought to. The average member of the US House of Representatives & Senate "earns" an annual salary of $174,00. The Majority and Minority leaders "earn" $193,00. The Speaker of the House "earns" $223,500. Add up these numbers. Then there are pensions: Members of Congress are eligible for a pension at age 62 if they have completed at least five years of service. They are eligible for a pension at age 50 if they have completed 20 years of service, or at any age after completing 25 years of service. The amount of the pension depends on years of service and the average of the highest three years of salary. By law, the starting amount of a member’s retirement annuity may not exceed 80 percent of his or her final salary. As of October 1, 2000, the average annual pension for members of Congress who have retired is between $52,464, and $46,932. I haven't been able to a...

Nothing really new here...but sometimes we all need a reminder. One is only insignificent if one refuses to live the life they have been given. Change is as constant as time. One must be willing to make change. One must be willing to be effected by change. If life isn't going the way you want it to, change it. Hate your job? Go find a new one. If your environment disagrees with you, move. Let no one rule you but yourself and your own judgement. Don't accept second place. If you fail, assess the failure and fix what needs fixed. It's better to try and fail than to not even bother. The smallest stone can cause a ripple. A microscopic germ can wipe out a nation. Drops of water can erode a mountain. Smiles, like yawns, are contagious. Known when enough is enough. Stand up for something. Treat your enemies well. You created them. Do right because it IS right. There is humor to all things. Find it. More to come.....

I quit drinking alcohol 1 month ago and ya know what, I feel great! Sobriety seems to suit me well. Now a lot of you are probably wondering why I quit drinking. To answer those queries, no, I don't believe I have any kind of drinking problem. I don't crave alcohol. I don't think that it in any way really got in my way in life. Simply put, I just figured it was time. I was tired of losing a day recovering after a night out. Even if I only had a few beers, the next day I'd usually feel worn out, so it was no longer worth it. Also, I noticed that alcohol would intensify my emotions a good deal. The last 2 times I went out drinking, I almost hit people...not good. On NYE, some little dirtbag was trying to mooch cigs off of me...something that most days doesn't phase me...but for some reason, this guy just set me off and I was ready to brain him! As I prefer to be in complete control of my temper at all times, I knew I had to stop. I've noticed a few things with my n...

"JUST FOR AMERICA: Shame on you America: A country where we have homeless without shelter, children going to bed without eating, elderly going without needed meds, and mentally ill without treatment - yet we have a benefit for the people of Haiti on 12 TV stations. 99% of people won't have the guts to copy and repost this." is what a friend has as her FaceBook update and ya know, I bet she's right! Don't get me wrong, I'm not belittling the recent tragedies in Haiti. Far from it! But let's put things into perspective shall we? The networks saw a chance to boost their ratings. The performers saw a chance to boost their popularity. And the folks in Haiti are most likely going to be waiting a good while before they see any of that donated money. If you want to help, donate to the Red Cross. They've always been above reproach in my book. (unlike many fly-by-night "charitable" organizations) Yes, what happened in Haiti was horrible. Almost as horr...

Its a new year and life is good! That said, time for a few things that've been running in and out of my head... I decided to quit smoking & drinking & to try to go semi-vegetarian. Not drinking has been a breeze. I don't eat much meat anyway so going semi-vegetarian has also been a breeze. But the quitting smoking has not been going well. I was born addicted to nicotine (aaaaah that lovely month-long stay in the incubator...just like a chicken) and if I'd known when I puffed that 1st ciggie all those years ago just how much of a slave I'd become, I never woulda done it! But we live and learn and I'm too damned stubborn to quit quitting. Pets: ya gotta love them...even when they "F" you up! Case in point, my cat Day-Z likes to hang out on the edge of the tub when I take a bath. She will usually splash me with her tail and she acts like she has no fear of the water...until she comes into contact with it! Yesterday, I just barely saved "my junk...