A Writer Challenge (for my equally warped friends)

I thought up a darkly comic spoof and thought it might be fun to share with my writer friends. Nothing serious (unless you want to it to be). 

A working knowledge of Margaret Atwood's HANDMAID'S TALE and/or THE TESTAMENTS will be useful. If you've only seen the television adaption, fine. Have at it. 

The Premise: Something resembling a zombie apocalypse has begun in Gilead. The dead are rising, seemingly in fulfillment of 1 Thessalonians 4:16: “the dead in Christ shall rise first.” They have returned to claim their new bodies. Everything else is up to the writer.

Then the rules:

1. NO ROMERO SILLYNESS.

  No automatic headshots, brain destruction, shambling hordes, “one bite and you're infected,” or other inherited zombie rules. If your dead have rules, invent them.

2. The dead are not necessarily zombies.

 Characters may call them zombies because that's the cultural reference available to them. The writer should never assume that diagnosis is correct.

3. 1 Thessalonians 4:16 matters.

The Biblical passage cannot merely be decorative epigraph material. Somebody in Gilead recognizes the apparent connection, and that recognition must affect what happens next.

4. They're here for their new bodies.

That's the one supernatural rule everybody gets. What “new bodies” means is entirely open. Resurrection? Replacement? Transformation? Reclamation? Something considerably stranger?

5. Gilead remains Gilead.

No abandoning Atwood's world the instant the dead appear. Commanders, Wives, Marthas, Handmaids, Aunts, Guardians, Eyes, theology, hierarchy and bureaucracy still exist. How does that society confront the impossible?

6. Nobody gets authoritative answers.

No scientist conveniently explains the phenomenon. No angel descends with an FAQ. No ancient manuscript contains the complete operating instructions. Characters can develop theories. They can even be right. They cannot know they're right.

7. Religion cannot simply be the punchline.

This one's important. Gilead's use of religion is ripe for savage comedy, but “Christians are stupid, LOL” is the easy route. Faith, scripture, political theology and institutional power are different things. The story should be smart enough to know the difference.

8. The horror and comedy should occupy the same room.

The situation is genuinely frightening. The comedy comes from human beings attempting to understand, control, bureaucratize and exploit it. Especially Gilead.

9. No outside rescue.

Canada doesn't roll in and solve everything. Neither does the remaining United States, NATO, scientists, aliens, God with a booming voice, or anybody else. The story belongs inside Gilead and stays there.

10. At least one Gilead certainty must be proven spectacularly wrong.

The regime confidently interprets something...and reality refuses to cooperate. Bonus points* if Gilead responds by changing the interpretation rather than admitting the mistake.

11. The risen must complicate Gilead, not merely attack it.

If they exist only to chase people down hallways, you've written generic zombie fiction wearing a red dress. Their existence should create a theological, social, moral, or political problem that couldn't exist anywhere but Gilead.

12. No easy ending.

 No magic cure. No “and then they killed the last zombie.” No reset button. Whatever has happened should leave behind a question larger than the story.

The Metzger Rule (What if? Then what?)

If your first idea is the obvious one, throw it away.

The dead have risen.

Gilead believes it understands resurrection.

Gilead is wrong.

Now tell us how wrong.

No writing The Walking Dead: Blessed Be the Fruit!

Have fun! No rush. I'd love to see someone actually attempt this, especially if they follow the 'rules'. 

- MCM

* No actual points will be awarded for anything. You might, however, receive an official ATTABOY! or FARKEN COOL!