That moment I realized just how awful I really am...

I've been a lifelong musician. If you know me, you already know that. I've been playing guitar for almost 40 years. Some will tell you that I'm really good. I've even had my moments when I thought I was.

But, any artist, regardless of their medium, has to grow. My first guitar hero was (and still is) Joe Negri. His jazz playing is astounding. So beautiful, skillful, and even...and that's one of the trickiest parts!

Blues, rockabilly, surf, rock & roll, punk, metal...none really require a great deal of discipline to play well. Just bash, bend, and twang. And it's a lot of fun! But (again....that 'but')...there comes a point when musically one wants to do more.

For the past couple of years, I've become a huge fan of a Brazilian guitarist named Naudo Rodrigues. If you're not familiar with him, don't be surprised. He's not a huge recording star. He probably could be if he wanted, but that doesn't seem to be his motivation. He makes his living playing in resorts in Spain. Just him and his guitar. And he'll blow you away. He can play pretty much any song and make it his own. He can take a song that you might loathe and turn it into a thing of beauty. He's just that good.

I watch videos of him playing and think "I wish I could...."

I finally decided that yes, I probably can, if only I start to rebuild some of the discipline I had in my younger days. Hell, I never practice. I just pick up the guitar and bash out the same old crap. I've decided to change that.

I bought a cheap flamenco guitar. I love the sound of nylon strings, and the wide, flat neck makes me work harder. I've started working on chord melodies...my goal to be able to play for hours without a band, without being boring.

Wow! I just made a quick demo of a song I'm trying to learn. It's a beautiful song called "Sabor A Mi". WOW....do I really suck! I can hear myself trying not to bash, bend and twang. I can hear the unevenness of my playing. I can hear every weak note. And you know what? That's a good thing! Recognizing one's weaknesses is necessary to turn them into strengths.

This is going to take awhile...but I'm patient. I know that at some point, I'll have an "aha" moment, just like I did with slide guitar. That said, I don't see it happening any time soon.

I'm taking myself back to the rudiments. Scales. Modes. Finger exercises. I'm training my right hand to do a lot more work. No pick for this stuff!

For years, people have asked me for lessons. I'm a lousy teacher. Now I'm looking to become a student again! I hope I'm a good one.